Monday, August 25, 2008

Loved and Lost

I recently dug this out from my high school papers. The topic: Agree or disagree with the following statement. 'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. My response at 17 years of age:

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I agree with this statement because when you are in love with someone it is an irreplaceable feeling and there is nothing like it in the world.

To have loved and lost does not necessarily weaken you. You could be sad at first, but in the end it'll only make you stronger than you were before. It serves as an experience and you learn from it. In the future you'll be able to face whatever comes your way.

To have never loved at all is to be robbed of something wonderful. It's to miss out on beautiful experiences which can only be felt if you try them for yourself. You can't know how it feels by reading or hearing about it. To have never loved at all is to be lost and confused because love guides us. You would never know how it feels to love someone and have someone love you.

It is better to have loved and lost because you feel all the wonderfulness of being in love which is priceless. To have had the chance to love, even for an instant, is to be blessed. To have never loved at all is to be lost all your life because love shows us the way to happiness."

Wow. I most clearly was just rambling off idealisms. How hopeful I was then! How rosy the world seemed! Now I'm not bitter or anything, but those college years did make me a bit jaded. At a time when everyone else seemed to have no problem pairing off at the snap of a finger, I was too busy telling myself I didn't need love. I'd manage just fine without it, I told myself. And when my parents divorced during my first year in college, it only cemented that idea even more. What was the point of seeking love if it didn't even last?

Today, I still go by idealisms and base my thoughts on things I've read or heard or wish, but they're now weighed down a tiny bit by experience. To 17-year-old me happy endings existed and love held so much power, but it was only because of what I imagined it to be. I had no clue on the subject and seven more years would pass by until I got my first inkling. Now at 26, do I agree with what I wrote back then?

Yes. It is better to have loved and lost. Knowing how hard it's been the last few months, I still wouldn't trade what I experienced for anything in the world and await the chance to get that back someday. I just hope fate is a little kinder with me the next time around.

*In my search for an image for this post, I came across this article titled How to Move On After a Break-Up. I found the steps kind of funny. And need a "roadmap through heartbreak and recovery?" Then here's your book!

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