Tuesday, October 20, 2009

How to Be Alone

I found the movie short I'd mentioned before! How to Be Alone was created by animator/director Andrea Dorfman and writer/composer/perfomer Tanya Davis to celebrate how lovely solitude can be.

I'm fairly comfortable being alone. In fact, I might seek it a bit too often and often wind up feeling...lonely.

Growing up, when things got rough at home I'd retreat into myself. I'd tell myself that when it became confusing and scary out there, I'd always find comfort within. Even though I had friends and sibs, I learned to enjoy my own company and found it easy to get completely lost in my own imagination - one that was then transferred onto the pages of my journals.

Since then I've learned that movies, dinner and traveling alone are not as terrifying as some believe. How silly it'd be to be scared of my awesome company - or scared of any curious onlookers! When I'm with me, I don't have to try to be engaging, intelligent, cool or witty. I don't have to be anything other than what I feel comfortable being at that time. I can let my guard down. I can be vulnerable, silly, curious - me.

I've picked myself apart and pieced me back together. I've let my mind wander off into random tangents and discovered new facets of myself I never knew existed.

In solitude, you can be unapologetic and selfish. No need for excuses if you daze during a convo. You can daydream as you wish, ask questions, lose yourself, become more you, nurse your wounds and find strength for the next steps to follow.

It's in these quiet moments, that your essence takes those precious breaths that sustain you.

Image: viff.org


  1. So true and well put! I've recently discovered this fact that I can do those things on my own as well!!


  2. I love being alone! It can get lonely and sometimes I think there's something wrong with me because I enjoy solitude so much. But then I realize it's just the way God made me. I'm just a girl who enjoys peace and quiet.

    Funny thing is, I'd really like to have a big family (I'm talking 4+ kids...) someday. But I like solitude? Hm...

  3. I love the time I spend with just me, myself, and I. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy doing things with my family - and the few friends I have close enough to do things with from time to time - but my alone time is my favourite time. I've always prefered my own company. Even as a child. I was the kid sitting alone in a corner of the playground with a book, or lost in my own thoughts.

  4. I take 30-minute walks at work and my husband asks how come I don't ask coworkers to join me. I responded that I like walking by myself. It gives me time to think instead of making small talk.

    Good post. Not many people are comfortable doing things on their own, especially going out to restaurants.

  5. I used to HATE being alone. Seriously. I would beg people to go to the grocery store with me. If I had to go to the bank, I'd make my younger brother go inside with me. I don't know why, but I just couldn't handle being by myself.

    Yesterday, I was 1 of 45000 fans at the Angels/Yankees game. I sat by myself. I've gone to movies and eaten out alone since I've gotten used to it as I've gotten older. But going to the game yesterday was a really huge step for me. And I enjoyed myself, by golly.

  6. Oh Karen, that's awesome! I haven't been to a game by myself yet, but I wouldn't have a problem with it and probably would if Dad ever said he couldn't attend a Mets v Phils game with me. I have been to a couple concerts by myself though and had a great time and met new people.

    I'm actually watching the Yankees v Angels game now. I'm torn on who to root for here. A Yankees v Phils game would be WONDERFUL, but I have to admit, the Yankees are type scary.

    And sugarlens, I know the feeling though I haven't taken many strolls alone since we moved to a new office. I've been doing those with the coworker. In fact, there's a photo-filled post scheduled for tomorrow :)

  7. Beautifully written... I think I know what I want for my birthday now.. just some time to myself.

  8. Unapologetic and selfish. Sometimes those are things we should take liberties to be. I loved reading this. Makes me feel slightly less guilty for the sleeping I did yesterday and the day before. Happy Wednesday.


Say word.